How to Stay Focused

That question has been going around in my mind over the last two days. How to stay focused in a world full of distractions? Right? That sometimes seems to be the million dollar question, and distractions often can literally cost you money, perhaps not a million, but you get the idea.

A Little Background For This Blog

Until now I have remained very focused on my goals, and I know that you can agree that it is important not to lose your focus. Sometimes, life happens, or let’s say, people happen, and bam! The lens is pulled off and your eyes wander, not sure what to concentrate on or concentrating on things and people that do not merit such attention.

Distractions are fine, but within limits. If you are running a business online, you cannot afford to be sidetracked by bad dates, someone’s shenanigans, or spending time wondering “why is x behaving like this?” “Why is x doing this to me?” I’ve been there too, and sometimes I do not seem to learn, but hey, we’re all human, we make mistakes.

This is why I decided to write this post, because in the last two days, someone distracted me from my online work, and while I knew that that person’s behavior was self-centered and I should not allow it to affect my daily work goals, I ended up giving it permission to affect me.

I figured that I am probably not the only one who gets those distractions, this is just part of our daily life, and some people deal with it better than others. I got my things back together after two days. For some it may be less time, but for others it may take a lot longer.

You Have Control

Sometimes we believe that people “do things to us”, and perhaps that may be true in some extreme examples, but in general we also allow them to affect us.

Some examples could be the following:

• Social media can be fun, and they allow you to stay in touch with friends and family, but if you want to use social media for your online business, do not get caught in the wasting time trap. Scrolling down your news feed and engaging in pointless discussions waste time and energy that could be used for something more productive.
• A friend is still mad at you despite your apology for what he/she believes offended him or her. It bothers you to no end. You’re hurt, because you apologized and apologized, but you keep on hearing accusations and arguments about how “you messed up”, “how you said this and that” which your friend may or may not have misinterpreted.
  
• Chatting online can be fun, but be careful. There are a lot of scammers out there. Don’t waste your time and energy on them.
• There are also many real people online who may be just as distracting as the friend I mentioned in my first bullet point. It is up to you to decide how much energy you want to spend on this and how much of your effort and energy that person deserves of you.
  
• Partying. While this may not apply now, unless you are planning a mini solo party at home during covid lock down, too much partying is distracting. We need to unwind from time to time. I do it too. I have the occasional glass of wine, but too much of anything is never good.When partying takes over your social life and drains your wallet, it is money thrown out the door and time that could be used for your business which you will not get back.

You’re in control here, You’re the one who decides what and who to give your attention to.

• Is your friend still mad? Did you apologize? Is she or he still arguing, despite your apology and attempts to solve things?
  
  If the answers to all three questions are yes, then you have done what you could. Concentrate on what is genuinely important to you (your upcoming book release, blog post, new product, anything you’re working on). Your friend will come around if he or she truly cares about you.
• That scammer? Send him packing, or her. Remember that poem I wrote about catfishing? 😉
  
• Is your online friend draining you emotionally, because you can’t do anything right for him or her? Let them blow of some steam. Don’t waste time fixing a problem that is based on misunderstandings (which chatting often leads to) if the other party doesn’t want to fix things.If that person means something to you, you can try to set things right, but there are two people here.If you mean something to your online friend, he or she should also come forward to set things right. If he/she doesn’t, perhaps it is time to let go.
  
• Partying is fun! But do not overdo it. There is a time for everything.

And you are the one who calls the shots here. You can decide if you are going to allow someone to drain you emotionally, causing you to lose focus. You could very well decide to keep on working and dedicate your time and energy on something that is worth it or someone who appreciates and accepts you for who you are.

You make the decisions. Make the right decisions. You cannot please everyone.

Call Those Shots

Pull the strings, don’t let someone pull your strings. No one is your puppet master and you are not a puppet. You are in control of your destiny.

Spend time with people who lift you up, not the ones who pull you down.

Write a to do list and then do all your assignments, checking them off one by one.

Write your goals. You could make a list of goals you want to achieve by the end of this year, and then narrow it down to monthly, weekly, and even daily goals. Achieving a goal – however big or small – is always a great feeling. It boosts your energy, bringing you fuel to achieve the next goal.

Circumstances or people who bring you down can’t give you that fuel, they rather drain you of it. Don’t let them drain you. Use your fuel for your own (figurative) car, so it can drive you to your objective.

In conclusion, don’t let anyone take away the sword you need to find the Holy Grail.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Have you been in similar situations? How has it affected you? What did you do to remain focused on your goals? Please let me know in the comments. I am looking forward to reading them. 🙂